I wrote a crappy little poem this morning, but in that crappy little poem were two lines that I like: The secret of our lives is to be here/ And breathe, and trust in all the living air. I like these lines for two reasons: 1. It seems to express something that I really believe, and 2. Although I believe that, I really didn’t know it until I wrote it.
Sometimes, when I am lying in the darkness with my husband, I say to him, “Tell me that everything is going to be okay.” And he almost always says, “Everything already is okay.” The first few times we had this conversation, I was annoyed, because my husband didn’t seem to understand what I was asking for. I wanted assurance that everything would stay okay FOREVER. Duh! But, of course, what I finally realized is that my husband is right. What is the point of having anxiety about the future? It only ruins our present life, and prevents us from living fully. The now is what is important. And, at those moments when we are together in the dark—how could there be greater perfection?
Even lives of great tragedy have moments of grace, of beauty. That is what it is important to remember. Here is what I am thinking about Art lately: the act of creation is art, and is what brings us closer to God/ the holy spirit/ the universe/ our humanity. There is undoubtedly a powerful force of creation in the Universe. You can call it God or the Big Bang, or whatever you like, but something at some point came from nothing. From nothing! The universe cannot help creating itself. And we, who are made from it and in its image, cannot help ourselves, either. When we try to stop the art from flowing, things get ugly. We can choose to create, or we can choose to destroy. (Not creating is a form of destruction—the thoughts are rejected before they are formed.) This is why you must keep doing your creative work, even if you’re afraid that you stink at it. Did the Universe stop at creating rocks and stars? No! It didn’t say, “Oh, an asteroid belt. This makes no sense. I give up!”
Fear no art! Good art can come from bad. Look at my two lovely lines that illuminated all sorts of thoughts for me. Creation is the way to understanding, and in that understanding is peace. I trust this living air. I trust that all of this writing will get me somewhere. And I trust that the somewhere it will lead me to is a sense of more deeply being here.